from here to there

list number one

2011-08-13T07:51:00.000-07:00

TEN PLACES TO WHICH I'D TRAVEL

1 Israel
2 Argentina
3 Japan
4 San Diego
5 New Mexico
6 London
7 Thailand
8 New Zealand
9 Santa Cruz
10 Canada

awareness

2011-08-13T07:45:00.000-07:00

Nashville is a good place.

there are good neighbors, good delis, good schools, good churches, good parks.
there is good coffee, good music, good work, good weather (most surprisingly!).

i can't stay here forever.
and "good" is looking like a ridiculous word.

and then there was..

2010-10-17T22:08:00.000-07:00

Tennesee.

it wins.

happenings of the heart

2010-09-07T12:49:00.003-07:00

WEST v. SOUTH

February 3, 2009

2010-07-18T21:55:00.000-07:00

BULLSHIT.

[sorry]

gonna make a confession:

2010-06-29T13:16:00.001-07:00

i hate confessing.

where i've been

2010-06-27T14:13:00.000-07:00

i want Heaven in my heart before it comes to Earth.

we are talking about Home. how it's more than just a place..but i'm thinking we're really talking about Heaven. stuff like that can't actually exist here. we are too glorious in our brokeness for that. i suspect we will find exactly the Where we want at the end. no more discontentment or displacement or longing..do you think some people are just born with an extra sense of Home?

what we ask for is "Thy Kingdom come..". for there to finally be Home on earth, the Heavens must come down.

give it up?

come on now

2010-06-27T13:29:00.000-07:00

how does that soul change so quick?

i am so literal and so jealous in this moment..

but eventually, my heart will fall completely out of me or i will throw it up.
there's a stop and a start, and how much more can i take?
how long will this body keep it up?

i want to think upon Goodness, Beauty, & Truth.
be still, wretched heart, and be branded with the Gospel.

this is not a test

2010-05-06T06:13:00.000-07:00

what on earth do i do now that he's gone?

THE OTHER WHERE

2010-04-12T21:39:00.000-07:00

oh where have we all gone?
one moment here, another there.

we care not for space and time anymore.

we zip around with our wings, one continent to the next.
no grass is greener.
no people sweeter.
no intentions deeper.

we yearn and long.
we sing a song of want.

what you want is now, and we are out..
somewhere..anywhere but here.

come on home

2010-02-20T08:04:00.000-08:00

love is all things Good, and i will myself to appease your hunger for it. but i am not enough..Who is able to pour himself out over and over a million times & still more? i have no such endurance even though my spirit be willing. i know i will die loving. and Love will ultimately carry me Home. in all Things, love. dear friends, i have not loved you as i ought.

eraser

2010-02-04T14:46:00.000-08:00

come bear a load.

as an uneasiness hanging over me - half-awake, shy, a bit unsteady - i could take all the entries of the last year and delete them..i suppose i only keep them as light insights to stay out of dark places. but even now in reading them, i don't want them.

& today, i've been thinking about Promises. how good is one's word? mine is like a little bird, obedient and content until the breadcrumbs run out; then, it flies up to a telephone wire. rush of wings and tones. oh i am so not tame!

i have not been tamed.

Spring 2009 L'Abri Recipes

2010-01-23T15:11:00.000-08:00

The First Lunch's Easy-Peasy Peanut Butter Cookies
serves 12

1 cup sugar
1 cup peanut butter
1 egg

1. mix all ingredients.
2. place on baking sheet in balls. bake at 325F for 10 min.

Rosemary Garlic Bread
1 loaf

3/4 cup flour
3 cups whole wheat flour
5 cups strong white flour
1/2 tbsp sea salt
2 pks yeast
4 cups warm water
8 minced cloves garlic
1/2 cup rosemary
olive oil

1. place water, salt yeast in a bowl. add whole wheat, white flour, garlic, rosemary.
2. stir until moist & smooth - not gummy.
3. gently knead & place dough in bowl to rise 1 hour. cover with a damp cloth.
4. place dough on baking sheet & let rise 1 hour. bake at 450F until golden. brush with olive oil.

Julia's Spicy Winter Veggie Chili
serves 24

24 tsp olive oil
6 med. butternut squash peeled, chopped
12 med carrots diced
18 tbsp chili powder
6 28 oz cans plum tomatoes
6 4 oz. cans mild green chiles chopped
3 pt water & 2 veggie cubes
1.5 tsp salt
12 15-19 oz cans black beans rinsed, drained
1.5 cup coriander chopped
24 tbsp yoghurt/sour cream
2 blocks cheddar cheese grated
soy sauce to taste

1. heat olive oil & saute squash in pan until golden. add carrots & onions with chili powder.
2. add tomatoes, chilis, water, cubes, salt. boil with beans & coriander
3. lower heat, cover, simmer until soft.
4. garnish with sour cream/yoghurt & cheese. serve alongside Sweet Cornbread.

Sweet Cornbread
serves 24

6 eggs lightly beaten
750 ml milk & sour cream
345g flour
345g polenta
6 tsp baking powder
1.5 tsp salt
6 tbsp sugar
345g cheddar cheese grated
675g frozen sweetcorn thawed

6. preheat the oven to 400 degrees F/200 C/Gas 6. Grease 9 inch sq baking tin.
7. combine milk and eggs mix in bowl.
8. in separate bowl stir in flour, polenta, baking powder, salt, sugar. add egg mix & stir in cheese & sweetcorn.
9. pour mix into tin. bake until toothpick comes out clean - about 25 min.
10. cool & cut to serve with butter & honey.

Marcie's Tuesday Meatloaf
Serves 12

1 kg minced organic beef
5 minced onions
12 minced cloves garlic
1/2 tbsp black pepper
1/2 tbsp sea salt
1.5 tbsp mustard powder
2 cup ketchup
3 cup worchester sauce
6 pieces bread (torn into small pieces)
6 cup whole milk
3 tbsp herbs d'Provence
2 eggs

1. saute garlic.
2. mix all ingredients together by hand!
3. place in pan & bake at 400F until crispy brown. serve with mashed potatoes & steamed veggies.

Veggie Cheese Penne
serves 24

6 carrots sliced thinly
8 shallots chopped
3 onions chopped
4 potatoes chopped
8 garlic cloves pressed
3 courgettes chopped
4.5 cups mushrooms sliced
4/5 tsp dried basil
2 bunches parsley chopped
1.5 tsp dried oregano
3 cups water
3 cups milk (substitute with rice/soy milk)
3/4 cup flour
2 cans chopped tomatoes
6 veggie bouillon cubes
600g cheddar cheese (grated)
1.5 tsp salt
1/5 cup yogurt
olive oil
Penne pasta
wine (red)

1. saute first 10 ingredients with olive oil in large pan (adjust amounts easily as you wish).
2. whisk water, milk, flour together in bowl. add tomatoes, veggie cubes, cheese, salt, wine.
3. boil 1&2 together until veggies are cooked through.
4. boil pasta & drain. toss with olive oil.
5. add yoghurt to #3 & remove from heat.
6. toss pasta with veggies & sauce & more cheese. serve with salad & garlic bread.

East Coast

2010-01-23T13:57:00.000-08:00

Marcie & Aaron will be wed around the end of May - why should i not spend my summer at Southborough L'Abri after? this has just begun to tumble around in my mind, but it would be oh so nice to visit there as i may not ever be on that Atlantic side again.

hopes agrarian

2009-12-18T16:14:00.000-08:00

dear old Irony

2009-12-10T18:20:00.000-08:00

we are not intelligent enough to learn from the past, but we think we know so much we can predict our futures..

oh how we are so proud!

indeed

2009-12-02T00:58:00.001-08:00

i have no poetry.
it has been spent
in dollars, in gasoline, in fast food, & in favors.
i left most on the bus, on the street, in your hand.

sleepy thoughts

2009-09-26T22:42:00.000-07:00

our apricot armpits & cinnamon teeth. oh women's bodies are mysterious.. don't you laugh now! bottles of lavender & longing. eye wrinkles, freckles, grey hairs, & gaps between your teeth: these could be possibly wonderful.

the interview

2009-09-07T20:30:00.000-07:00

Helper Family

2009-08-31T13:51:00.000-07:00

dear ones, you are well missed, but we will all be well.

all manner of things will be well.

you know.

reading..

2009-08-13T12:23:00.000-07:00

..how i want to spend my time

packing..

2009-08-03T22:15:00.000-07:00

i have my green backpack stuffed to bursting.
it is full of warm & cold weather clothing.
it has a toothbrush & toothpaste.
i have only what i need.

i made enough bean burritos to last a lifetime.
..where's the beer?

no Chains.

now all i wait for is my Chariot.

onward

2009-07-29T23:30:00.000-07:00

i know i wish to move forward.
i wish i knew how to move forward.

there is more to life than the past - there we learn, here we memorize, ahead we practice yet again & again.

there is much to hope for.

i'm alive, i promise

2009-07-28T17:23:00.000-07:00

but i'd say

i'm a million miles away.

yet i believe

2009-07-20T11:35:00.001-07:00

http://www.salvationmountian.us/

i need less

2009-06-16T00:08:00.000-07:00

i, needless to say, want more:
more out of who i Am,
more out of Those i love,
more out of Society.
more out of the God they love.

we are surrounded

2009-06-12T23:00:00.000-07:00

Lust. Consumerism. Money. Competition. Emptiness. Capitalism. Worry. Loneliness. Despair. Rage. Careerism. Displacement. Animals. Disrespect. Want. Cynicsism. Disappointment. Exclusivity. Judgement. Boredom.

let us be like living Ladders to lean against the trees, coaxing Lost Children up & up to eat their Life-giving fruit. we are crazy, but our longing is our justification.

here i stand

2009-05-17T01:47:00.000-07:00

this is a Ritual assent to a place i've stood before
Sunday after Sunday between pews & people.
this is a nod towards the Hymns & Readings,
the Liturgy,
the Body of Christ,
the Apostles' Creed,
the Lord's Supper.

six Days between our weekly Meetings,
& six Months since i've taken part..
do not expect me to pick up where i left off.
do not expect me to walk forward when i've stopped.

lame men have waited half their Lives to walk.
i have been crippled by Fear, Anger, Doubt, Love, Life, & God?

this is a Ritual assent to the place i kneeled Day by Day
placing my damned Life upon an Altar.
i can't stay away..

how can i return?
Tomorrow i go.

timeline

2009-04-30T11:11:00.000-07:00

Today, there are no curtains on my window; the Sunlight may come in more the brighter for not having shades to draw, & i may See more freedom than i will know what to do with.

the Days before that have been me not trying to see a Plan but a Shape. it amuses me how much it looks like a Tree at the moment.

i've been considering the Bonsai trees. how i don't want to be like that.

this wasn't a dream

2009-04-27T17:07:00.000-07:00

the best thing we saw were each other.

i will never be the same

2009-04-26T01:31:00.000-07:00

i have returned o so small & alone..

here everything can & will be answered with strict knowledge.

fear, paranoia, &..

bombs.

i feel as though i walk through a minefield. also, that i am already shell-shocked. more so that i must run, run, run before i get hit again by the paralyzing Familiarity & Inevitability of it all.

L'Abri

2009-03-08T05:28:00.000-07:00

Adventures. purposeful. insane. Escape. Truth. hugs & kisses. love. Space. life. Tensions. Pilgrim. rest. blessings. sustainability. Boundaries. Loneliness. laughter. Relationship. daffodils. Home. hospitality. wandering. harmful. hurtful. Peace. realization. Creativity. Desire. decisions. Warmth. tears.

Community.

singing out of tune

2009-03-08T05:15:00.000-07:00

i get the feeling that i am walking Here purposefully with Eyes closed, listening for the squelch of mud so i can step into every mucky puddle.

i feel as though i'm looking for the tall wooden bridges to jump off.

i'm looking for train tracks to lay on with a schedule of the next arrival in hand.

&..a good Choice can become very bad if in a wrong Context.

discovery

2008-12-24T16:39:00.000-08:00

Community may be wherever I AM.

a small happiness

2008-12-24T14:09:00.000-08:00

tiny paper boats on the window sill & wee birdies flying from the ceiling. flowers all the time.

we will make it a Place.

o Community, how i miss You!

some sort of peace

2008-12-24T01:12:00.000-08:00

i miss the Country & the long wanderings through footpaths & pastures.

i want the peace of flight upon an everlasting Wind, & i am afraid i will never find it in another place.